An Occasional Guide to Irish Life: The beautiful woman who repels men.

Frosty!

Frosty!

The first time men see her, they stop to look. Superficially, she has it all. She’s pretty, slim, tall, elegant. She dresses well, and she’s accomplished too, a rising star in her profession. She’s never had a problem attracting men.

Until they actually meet her, and her personality kicks in. She is the black hole of charisma, humourless and po-faced to a degree normally unseen outside of a comedy review. She gives thin, slight upturns of her mouth to jokes and witty banter, as if she knows what is expected of her but isn’t sure why, like she’s trying to copy it from memory.

The sad thing is that she is not a bad person. She’s kind, in a cold, practical way, and can be quite selfless, and wonders why men never seem to call her after the third date. It’s not that she’s even bad in bed, it’s that men her age are looking for a companion, whereas with her, it’s like being involved with a sexy Mary Poppins. Intriguing at first, but quite weird when your friends see you.