An Occasional Guide to Irish Politics: The Nervous Labour Handwringer.

It's just not fair! We're the nice party!

It's just not fair! We're the nice party!

It didn’t take long, and that was the first thing that made her cheeks redden slightly. Fresh from Labour’s greatest every victory, winning seats in places undreamt off, and knocking Fianna Fail (Fianna Fail!) into third place, it was Christmas and Birthdays and the Lotto all rolled up in one. Yes, things were hard, but now that Labour are in power tough but fair decisions can be made. Tough but fair, not like Fianna Fail who were only in it for themselves and the money and their banker buddies.

Some of the decisions are great. Putting Zappone in the Seanad, and the gender quota, that’s the stuff! Then the Special Needs Assistants have to go…wait, sorry, what was that? Surely there’s been some mistake?

Then corporate donations are retained, something about the constitution. But, didn’t we know about the constitution before we promised…sorry, WHAT? WATER CHARGES? WATER CHARGES? Labour has been out of power for 14 long years and now Shinners and the People’s Front of Judea are putting out leaflets attacking Labour’s right-wing water privatisation agenda? But, we’re the goodies! They’re our special words! Stop using our special words! 

Ok…deep breaths…we all have to be realistic…look, if it wasn’t for Labour, Fianna Fail would be bringing in some form of third level fee! Sorry? Who’s on the phone? The Department of Education? What do they want? 

Is that the political ghost of John Gormley in the corner? What’s he laughing at?

One thought on “An Occasional Guide to Irish Politics: The Nervous Labour Handwringer.

  1. You forgot the property tax. That’s going to go down well. And doubling the carbon tax. Motor tax is promised to rise and the IMF programme states that income tax bands and credits will fall for two years running while the prog for govt has promised not to touch them.

    And you’ve just your hired your families and you’re stuffing state boards like the old days, it’s just that the chairmen will be questioned at committee.

    And in the name of fairness, Labour is committed to the Croke Park agreement so that public sector workers will not have their salaries reduced but will instead have their numbers voluntarily reduced. So that instead of reducing the pay and maintaining service quality and the number of people in employment, you will instead allow services to be done badly by fewer people, you will have fewer people employed and you will of course allow the best people in the public service to leave while the dead wood hang onto their jobs with the grip of drowning men.

    You guys are going to be flayed alive. Enjoy.

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