Starbuck’s concessions in Social Welfare offices.



Minister Mary Hanafin is delighted to announce that due to the huge increase of middle class people signing onto the dole for the first time, she has decided to allow Starbucks to open concessions in dole offices across the country to help them adjust.

 As a further gesture towards the changing social structure of welfare recipients, Jobseeker’s Benefit will now be renamed iPod Users Chill Out Time Assistance.

A proposal to open offices in Marks and Spencer Food Halls is also under  discussion, as is a pilot scheme to pair single middle class people together for moral support during their first visit to Aldi to do their actual groceries as opposed to looking for a cheap power drill.

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