The Man In The Pub Talks About A New Party.

TMITP: Yes, we should have a new party!

ME: What should it stand for?

TMITP: Well, it should be for the ordinary people, for a start. You know, the Guards, farmers, young people, old people, unemployed, businesspeople, doctors, nurses, people with disabilities. That sort of thing?

ME: So, everybody except property developers and people associated with banks?

TMITP: Absolutely. Except for Sean Quinn, of course. Or my brother in law, obviously. And yer man who built the clubhouse for the hurlin’ in the parish, he’s a lovely fella. NAMA are giving him a shockin’ hard time, I hear.

ME: And what should the new party stand for?

TMITP: Well, it should be against all these taxes, for a start! and all these cutbacks too! Now, I’ve a sister in law who’s a nurse and she has taken a cut of……

ME: Sorry to cut across you, but you want a new party that supports cutting taxes and increasing public spending?

TMITP: That’s right.

ME: Wasn’t that basically the policy of Fianna Fail, Fine Gael, Labour and the PDs that got us into this mess?

TMITP: Eh…yeah…but they forgot about the ordinary people. A new crowd could, like, do it better.

ME: How?

TMITP: By listening to the ordinary people.

ME: Like say the bus drivers, maybe?

TMITP: That crowd! They should be put up against the wall! And don’t get me started on the teachers!

ME: So, teachers aren’t ordinary people, in your opinion?

TMITP: They’re like royalty. Ah, here’s Tom!

ME: Hello Tom. Yer man here was saying teachers are like royalty!

TOM: Are you joking! My youngest is a teacher! The teachers are carryin’ the country! Carryin’ it! If there’s anyone on the pig’s back, it’s the nurses!

TMITP: Now steady on there! The nurses…

ME: Sorry to interrupt Tom, a quick question: do you think we need a new party?

TOM: Oh, absolutely!

ME: And who would it be for?

TOM: The ordinary people, of course!

ME: Grand. What are you drinkin’, Tom?

One thought on “The Man In The Pub Talks About A New Party.

  1. I heard a scientist say his publisher warned him (when writing for the general public) that every equation he put in his book would halve his sales. Similarly for new political parties – everyone thinks they are great and overdue, but every policy they actually articulate halves their number of potential voters.

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