An Taoiseach and minister for Up Mayo!: Inda.

Minister for Testicular Manipulation: Phil Hogan.

Minister for Renaming The HSE The Health Operations Logistical Executive (HOLE):  James Reilly

Minister for Really Hard Sums That Have Greek Letters In Them And Need Log Tables: Richard Bruton

Minister for Containing Gayness: Lucinda Creighton

Minister for Voldemort Affairs: Leo Varadkar

Minister for Nice Suits: Simon Coveney

Minister for Shouting And Up Mayo More!: Michael Ring

Minister for Speaking In A Low Voice That Sounds Calm: Michael Noonan

Minister for This is Very Serious: Eamon Gilmore

Minister for Haranguing: Go on, guess!

Minister for Fianna Fail Reminders: Pat Rabbitte

Minister for Talking To People Who Own Things Without  Scaring The Shite Out Of Them: Ruairi Quinn

Minister for Talking To Foreigners And Pronouncing Guy In A French Way Without Sniggering: Pat Cox.